Doubtless Purpose
Amanda, Age 14, Alameda, CA

People expect me to know why
What, where, when, who, how
Yes, no, maybe, never
And I'm not going to be able to certify
I'm stupefied
At the least, preoccupied
Since it's not easy to identify
And you certainly won't be satisfied
Why I'm here, I don't know
It's information overflow
It's in there, somewhere deep below
Passing through me, but
I lose the ideas as I let go
Sure, I have a right to know
But my memory was caught in the undertow
It's difficult answering yes or no
Nothing is so easy
And we're going to disagree
When you hear my prophecies
But it's not always what I make it to be
I'm the player but God's the referee
And it's killing me
This is a game I can't replay
My future is a play-by-play
And it's all going the wrong way
Just let me get through today
I guess what I'm saying is
Maybe my future is already planned out
And incorrect when it falls out
Maybe He knows my future inside and out
Or maybe, I could do without
I could live to the fullest, day in, and day out
And my chaotic life could actually work out
Without the weight of doubt
It might be a long shot
Doing everything you say I cannot
Not to mention the risk of getting caught
Oh, well, thanks a lot
So I'll drink my tea and write my poems
While listening to this crappy old radio
Paying the price as I go
And I hope you know
That your doubt has made me grow
This pondering has set me aglow
My thoughts ebb and my thoughts flow
But I still don't know

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